Until our beloved Jerry can find a sleeping schedule, I’m finding it very hard to have any kind of routine. Some nights he’s in bed by midnight, other nights he’s in bed by 9 (and in all cases, he’ll certainly wake up several times.) My evenings are completely uncertain - I’m essentially at Eriko and Jerry’s disposal. Couple that with my own lack of internal discipline (i.e. 30 mins of TV vs 30 mins of reading) and I’m losing ground on Japanese and CS GRE study… and let’s not enough mention the complete and utter lack of exercise, especially since (in an effort to have more time at home) I drove to work every day last week.

I spoke with two professors yesterday and I was relatively convinced that I was going to transition to academia… but then I came in and talked it over with my boss. After that conversation, I had an epiphany… this situation is very similar to the time I broke up with Eriko, slept on it, and woke up to realize that no - I didn’t want to break up… I just needed to be patient, figure out a way to get through our troubles, and learn to love her - because it was what I wanted.

Isilon has now officially registered for an IPO. How exciting. =)

100 “cool” books.

I guess I was just in the right frame of mind, but somehow I managed to find my way to this paper on perfectionism. It really hit home. I do think of myself as gifted - but in recent times that faith has been shaken. Quite honestly, it has been somewhat of a roller coaster - affected largely by events around me. As I mature physically, emotionally, and spiritually, my quest to understand myself gains more importance. Believing that this quest is worth it, despite the pain of effort, is my first step towards peace.