journals, diaries

i really should make more of an effort to write in my diary, on a regular basis. i love reading Zack’s, and Katrina’s, and Matthew’s. i try to remember to do it every day and i am dissappointed when i don’t see anything new. sometimes i am bothered by the content and it forces me to analyze why i’m bothered, what it is about myself that i dislike in their words. i’ve noticed i’m becoming a little more theoretical, a little more analytical, a little more thoughtful. i’m actually starting to read again, slowly. my brain doesn’t have the focusing power it did when i was a kid and i am often distracted, sometimes mid-sentence or even in the middle of a word. its quite amazing to recognize myself lose focus while part of me is still reading, as if the volume on one channel is slowly drowning out that of another. i have a lot of things i want to do in this life. i know that in retrospect, i will be granted the opportunity to glimpse everything i desire; in the moment, though, i fe! ar the passing of time.