sometimes i feel like i get in the habit of just writing the good things down. there are definitely some good opportunities ahead of me and i feel very good about who i am and where i’m going (at this particular moment in time). i miss my girl and i don’t hear from her that much. its strange, it makes me wonder, it makes me reminisce. of course, i feel like this is a test: i need to leave her alone, let her figure herself out, etc. not only that, but i feel like this is just right for me – i need to get myself on track. if she were here now i wouldn’t have time to sit in my undies and hack away on some PHP in front of my three monitors. i wouldn’t be able to sleep on the floor in front of my oversized TV and watch seinfeld for an hour before i go to bed. if i were to script my life, i wouldn’t change a thing. i know its hardest to remember how amazingly tailored and perfected life is when you need to remember it most. so i’m lucky i can “see” it now. my hands shake a little as a write this. its as if i reach a t where i am communicating directly from my soul.