Bailey has recently decided that the best place to sleep when i'm home is on my
desk. not only that, but she really enjoys it when my homework assignment is
underneath her and her feet rest upon my textbook. i do enjoy her company, so
i'm not chasing her away.
October 2004 Archives
my 'free' week has turned into a work week. it is the 'final push' for our latest release. of course, i have more than one
release to work on.... i spent about 11 hours at work today and i'm not sure if i have anything exciting to talk about. i'm
hoping to spend my remaining evening working on a little prolog, cleaning my room, and watching some Seinfeld.
i find that when i have one beer, i tend to want two. one glass of wine turns into two. it seems i have little self control when it comes to drinking. back in college it was much worse, so i must be making progress. whether that progress is due to my body's natural lower tolerance or my own volition, i imagine it is
a combination of both. i need to keep a closer eye on myself.
my professor decided not to give us any written assignment this week, just an exercise in prolog. although that will be
challenging, i am much better at exercises where i can "generate & test." otherwise known as solving by trial and error.
it is both a lack of experience and impatience, i think. tomorrow a few guys from work might come over to watch game 3
of the world series. i bought some beer, just in case. on Wednesday i'm going to a UW recruiting event with Isilon. we're
looking for smart youngsters who wanna kick some bootie. in a similar note, i really hope Zack finds a good job.
i'm finding that my AI homework is a lot more difficult than i expected. it
really reminds me how weak my brain has become from lack of exercise. i'm also
very undisciplined, but ignoring that, i worked for several hours on one
problem. i spent a long time perfecting a solution when i realized i had
started with an incorrect premise. i went to go to sleep and then it dawned
on me and i stayed up another 45 minutes to write down the correct starting
condition. now i have to solve the problem all over again, but i think it
will be correct this time. i still have three more to go after this one!
with all the stuff i've got going on, my biggest challenges are internal. i tend to procrastinate, to shortcut, to become frustrated, and even apathetic. thankfully, i saw several moments
this week where i did the right thing when put in one of these spots. honestly, there were many more moments when i did the wrong thing -- but there is hope. sometimes i feel like it is
impossible and then i'm reminded of all the other times i thought it was impossible and yet, somehow, it became. all i can do is pray for help and do my best to believe that i have what
it takes. when there is a break, it is good to reflect on this fantastic journey. so many hopes. so many dreams. so many opportunities.
plagued by another night of restless sleep. i don't recall it taking long to get to sleep, but for some reason i woke up around 3. i let Bailey in and couldn't go back to sleep for quite
a while. eventually, the sandman came but his potion was weak; i had a strange restless dream until my alarm clock brought me out of it. right now, i can't think of anything worse than
being woken up by an alarm clock. how unnatural!
i often make mental diary entries but either don't remember to write it down or
can't recall what it is i thought of. this morning i woke up on the wrong side
of the bed. i'm not sure exactly how that is possible, considering that the bed
is bordered by a wall, but perhaps it was secretly rotated while i slept. or
didn't sleep. i went to bed pretty early last night because i was pooped from
having three beers and eating pizza while watching the ALCS game 1. my co-worker
Greg came over and that was cool. as is typical with me, though, i began to
castigate myself for not doing my homework or studying japanese. i tried the
former but started to doze off on the couch. i didn't sleep real well, and it
feels like i haven't had a good night's sleep in a long time. i know this is
true because i've been tracking in my sleep database how often i sleep
through the night, and the last time was in july. not to mention that there are
only 9 solid nights out of 305. a lot of that is Bailey; part of me is aware
that she is outside and wakes me up so that i'll let her in. this happens at
least once, maybe twice. the other problem is likely my bed, which i can't
seem to get comfortable on. i want Eriko to help pick out out a bed so i've
refrained but i might have to start sleeping on the floor until then. when
i finally wake up, feeling unrefreshed, i check my email from work and find
more bugs. this time in the cycle there is a lot of pressure, as we have a
specific date to hit and each problem is an obstacle that must be overcome
quickly. as a lead i can't help but feel "more" pressure but it is probably all
the same. i'm missing Eriko as well. i've come to realize that she seems to
miss me as soon as i leave and then recovers, while i miss her gradually and
my longing peaks a few months after i've seen her. i'm not excited to leave
home tonight; it is a morning where i wish i could just crawl into a hole
and hibernate.
i'm still disorganized, but i made it to class OK last night. i'm excited about
this class. the material looks new and challenging and i think i'll like the
format. hopefully i can excel. i can't take japanese this semester because it
conflicts with my UW class but i hope to get some good solid self-study time
in. i don't have a routine yet (nor do i appear to have the discipline for one)
but i have high hopes. currently i'm working on three different releases at
work, which is really quite a challenge. i'm going to have to stay on my toes
in order to stay ahead of everything i want to do.
i can't help but be surprised at the amount i ate and drank last night, and
the fact that i stayed out until 4 am. luckily i don't spaced the beer out
enough that i don't really have a hangover, but my body is definitely not
real happy with me. i guess this was the best time to do it, since i start
school tomorrow.
i was there, the night when ichiro hit #258. it was a very exciting moment.
me and some of my co-workers are going to see a Mariner's game tonight. Ichiro
is two away from breaking George Sisler's ~80 yr record, and it would be super
sweet if we were able to see it happen.